Not Haunted-House Scary, but still Scary

Many years ago, around the age of 12, I was invited to a friend’s birthday party… on Halloween day.

I knew there would be a haunted house and scary things.

And if you know me, you know I don’t like scary things… never have, never will. It was a good friend – I HAD to go!

My turn came, I walked in. There sat a witch peering into a crystal ball. She looked at me with evil eyes and said, “What’s your phone number.”

I meekly said, “279-4641″.

She screamed at me! I didn’t say your PHONE number, I said your FAVORITE number!”

“Oh! Uhhhhh – 3”. I said meekly.

I don’t remember her response, but I do remember running out of the room!

I still don’t like scary things – I don’t even like suspensful things.

So, a normal reaction and question would be, how in the world did I learn to love working with those with advanced illness and at the end-of-life? Let’s face it, it can be scary.

Not haunted-house scary, but still scary.

One of the top responses I get from others when they consider gentle-massage for their patient is fear. They’ll say:

“But what if I make them worse while massaging them?”

“I’m afraid of making them worse, I just can’t touch them.”

It’s a reasonable feeling and response. But, don’t you think your patient deserves comfort, relaxation and pain relief during their journey.

And, while you might not be able to imagine it at the moment, providing safe, effective touch will make YOU feel better too. I can almost guarantee it.

How do you get past the fear and scary thoughts?

Here are 5 things you can do right now, to calm the fear and provide a gentle-touch massage for your patient with love and compassion.

CALM

Deliberately be the Calm One in the Room: When your patient is experiencing pain it can be scary to touch them. When the caregiver remains calm, everyone in the room has permission to remain calm. Deliberately enter the space slowly, speak softly and offer your patient gentle touch. Calmness is contagious.

PRESENCE

Ground yourself. Being fully present tells your patient, "I'm here for you!" Start by feeling your feet touch the floor. Concentrate on the connection of your feet to the surface below. Take a few deep breaths and allow focus before touching your patient.

SLOWER

Move slower both on and off the body. Moving slower in the space invites calmness. Slow massage strokes allows the parasympathetic nervous system to engage. Slow invites trust between patient and caregiver. Slow allows the patient to rest and therefore, heal.

SOFTER

Adjust pressure for your patient by pretending you're massaging a ripe peach. Shift the way you think of massage for someone who is ill. Heavy pressure puts more demand on the body and can cause your patient to feel worse. Softer pressure is a must for those who are ill.

I hope you’ll consider giving it a try! I’d love to hear from you.

susan@progressivemassagetherapy.com

PRESENCE Ground yourself. Being fully present tells your patient, "I'm here for you!" Start by feeling your feet touch the floor. Concentrate on the connection of your feet to the surface below. Take a few deep breaths and allow focus before touching your patient.

SLOWER Move slower both on and off the body. Moving slower in the space invites calmness. Slow massage strokes allows the parasympathetic nervous system to engage. Slow invites trust between patient and caregiver. Slow allows the patient to rest and therefore, heal.

SLOWER Move slower both on and off the body. Moving slower in the space invites calmness. Slow massage strokes allows the parasympathetic nervous system to engage. Slow invites trust between patient and caregiver. Slow allows the patient to rest and therefore, heal.

SOFTER Adjust pressure for your patient by pretending you're massaging a ripe peach. Shift the way you think of massage for someone who is ill. Heavy pressure puts more demand on the body and can cause your patient to feel worse. Softer pressure is a must for those who are ill.

PRESENCE

Ground yourself. Being fully present tells your patient, "I'm here for you!" Start by feeling your feet touch the floor. Concentrate on the connection of your feet to the surface below. Take a few deep breaths and allow focus before touching your patient.

SLOWER

Move slower both on and off the body. Moving slower in the space invites calmness. Slow massage strokes allows the parasympathetic nervous system to engage. Slow invites trust between patient and caregiver. Slow allows the patient to rest and therefore, heal.

SLOWER

Move slower both on and off the body. Moving slower in the space invites calmness. Slow massage strokes allows the parasympathetic nervous system to engage. Slow invites trust between patient and caregiver. Slow allows the patient to rest and therefore, heal.

SOFTER

Adjust pressure for your patient by pretending you're massaging a ripe peach. Shift the way you think of massage for someone who is ill. Heavy pressure puts more demand on the body and can cause your patient to feel worse. Softer pressure is a must for those who are ill.