Judging others. We do it all the time. Yes, YOU and ME! We’re all guilty. I think it’s part of being human. We automatically judge others without really thinking about it. And then, we share our opinions with others, even when they’re not accurate or welcome.
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The person in the grocery store moving too slow for us.
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The woman wearing a dress we consider inappropriate.
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The father raising his voice at his small child.
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And the list goes on… we judge others instantly.
I recently had the opportunity to provide gentle-touch massage for a client who lived alone. I saw him weekly for several weeks. He was quite ill, used a walker when mobile, had bad eyesight and was on oxygen 24/7.
I found myself with all the normal thoughts and questions when I was in his home:
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Why is he in this big house by himself?
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Who prepares his meals?
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Where are his children? And why aren’t they here helping?
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Why is he alone all the time? It’s not safe for him to be alone.
And the list goes on.
After several weeks, I learned that his spouse passed many years earlier and children were scattered across the US.
Still… why aren’t they here? “I WOULD BE AT MY FATHER’S SIDE IN THIS SITUATION!” (Said with extreme sarcasm!)
But then, I realize. I’m seeing a very, very small part of the big picture. I don’t need the answers to the questions to be an effective caregiver and provide gentle-touch massage.
The things I must have:
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a caring heart
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the ability to stay centered and focused
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a listening ear to hear the stories
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the ability to leave the stories at the door
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a pair of willing hands to provide gentle-touch
My encouragement for you:
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When you find yourself judging the situation, stop and consider that you might not have all the facts.
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More importantly, you don’t NEED all the facts to provide safe, effective gentle-touch massage.
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Realize it’s not always possible to change things for others, even as bad as you would like to.